How I fell in love:

I remember that day ever so early.

I was sitting in Island Creamary, dipping stawberry Pocky sticks into my applecrumble ice-cream. I was with my cell group. I remember tuning out of their conversation and watching the cars go by from the ceiling-to-floor glass windows.

It was when I heard.


Clarity by John Mayer.

It was the perfect song, for that particular laidback day of ice-cream.

So I began, at the age of sixteen, loving John Mayer.





Then again, every song of his is perfect.
I've come to appreciate him alot these few months. Watching his random ramblings during shows on Youtube, you find that he is so unafraid of criticism, at times putting his foot in his mouth.

But I think for every JM fan, it's what they love about him: his honesty.

Of course, the fact that he's so so hot! :D I mean, he's not handsome but he's just like, so talented, so confident of himself, so at ease that you'll be a melted puddle.

I want to see him perform. Still on my to-do list before I die.

Try the album Where The Light Is!

















And I think JM is waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy better than Jason Mraz. Mraz is nowhere near JM. (HEHEHEHE Pravin, online declaration.)

Sometimes I wonder if I am missing out in life.

Especially when I log into Facebook and see my friends (and 'friends') sun-tanning on the beach, partying --> not necessarily drinking, eating yummy food, having fun with friends etc.

And I'm sitting on my old green roller chair scrolling through the 'recently posted wall'.

Maybe sometimes I'll play iSketch, Jamlegend (don't roll your eyes if you know what it is! I prolly can beat you on Skilled. >:D ) or watch telly.

The thing is, everytime before I head out of the house, one thought never fails to get out of my brain: How can I escape this?

It's like there is this spring that pulls me back into the house everytime before I leave it. If I'm going out to meet a friend for dinner I'll think: I don't really feel like going out. Maybe I shouln't go out. So what excuse can I come out with this time?

So the times where you see me out of the house, it's when I run dry of excuses not to.

I do that for everyone though. Even babe. (don't hit me please!! *cower*)

****
The weird thing is that if I go out consecutively for like, three days, I start to feel very unhappy and think I'm in desperate need of a cave day --> term for days where I stay at home, refusing to go out.

Really really unhappy. On the third consecutive day where I head out, I'll be thinking: I need to leave early somehow. Or: I really dislike this person (even though I actually don't). I'll turn into this irritable, nasty and mean bitch even w/o PMS.

This is where I feel terribly conflicted. While others seem having fun, when I am in their shoes, I feel absolutely discontented. Oh, I know I'm a weirdo already, thanks.

So I reach back to the same conclusion everytime. I'm always happier staying at home, wondering what I am missing out in life. Because, in reality, I don't know what I am missing out since I do not know how the appreciate the real joys of social life.